If You Wish Upon a Shooting Star
by Anime King of Kings
Summary: This is a small collection of stories revolving around Naruto, his friends, and the Akatsuki. Hope you injoy the humor. Rated M for language used. Mostly Because of Hidan


AKK: Yo! This is a small collection of stories that will be funny, yet weird at the same time. Naruto, would you please?

Naruto: No.

AKK: N…. NO!?

Naruto: Yes! You tortured me in this chapter!

AKK: You will do the disclaimer or I swear to Kami, I'll pair you with Sasuke in the next chapter!

Naruto: You wouldn't dare….

AKK: Yes, I would!

Naruto: Fine…. AKK does not own Naruto or Bleach. He is also not responsible for any heart attacks due to 'awesomeness'. Happy?

AKK: Yes. Now on with the show!

Naruto: Can I leave now?

AKK: No!

**A Sleepless Night**

Naruto Uzumaki roared in frustration. He was tired and trying to get some sleep, but sadly the walls were paper thin. So that meant he got to hear all the 'noises' coming from next door.

Slowly, he stood up and walked out side on to the balcony, giving up on getting sleep. His angrily thoughts wondered to the noisy neighbors, but he shook those thoughts away, a faint blush on his cheeks.

"Stupid neighbors…." He muttered as he looked up at the sky. Tomorrow is the Chunin

Exam, or should he say the exam was today. It's already 3 in the morning!

Suddenly a light caught his eye as he saw it shoot down. Thinking quick, Naruto closed his eyes and made a wish.

'_I wish I was strongest, tallest, and hottest guy in the village, and that everyone in the village would respect me and do everything I tell them to do!' _

Chuckling he went back inside. He was acting like a little kid! Shooting stars don't really grant you a wish! With that thought in mind, he went back to bed and smiled. The neighbors finally stopped!

'_Now, maybe I could sleep a bit before-'_

Before he could finish that thought, the 'noises' came back to life, as if just to spite him! Angrily, he got down on his knees, he looked up to the heavens and shouted at the top of his lungs," Damn you, Kami! What have I done to deserve this, you sick and perverted Bastard!?"

Naruto knelt there, panting from shouting so much. He smirked as he knew Kami could do nothing, but take the insult. Suddenly, to his dismay, the noise next door was ten fold as a dark blush appeared on his face.

"No! You can't do this to me! I'm sorry! I'M SORRY!" He cried to the heavens and Kami indeed answered his prayers, but not the way Naruto wanted.

The noises next door suddenly got louder, if it was possible. Naruto guess it was Kami's way of saying,_" It's too late to apologize! Who's a sick, perverted, bastard now!?"_

Naruto quickly put a pillow over his head as he lay back down. You could hear his cries of misery all the way to the sand trio's apartment, which was on the other side of the village.

With Kami:

Kami would have felt pity, but hey, the Nine Tails never paid him back for that poker game, so they were even. Now the fox would never get some sleep! Kami laughed evilly to himself before his mother grabbed him by the ear.

"You'll play with your friends later! It's the middle of the night!" She hissed. Kami Jr pouted and somehow he looked just like a four year old.

"MOM! They're not my friends!" Kami Jr whined.

"So why won't you let that boy sleep?" His mother growled, close to snapping.

"Uh…" Kami stuttered as his mom glared at him.

"I'm waiting."

"I was just practicing my Kami skills! I was going to stop, but the boy cursed at me so I lost it!" He explained quickly, getting on his knees." I'm sorry!"

"Get your ass to bed!" His mother growled as Kami jr. quickly nod and scurried off to bed as his mother went to her own, an evil grin on her face as she suddenly the walls paper thin and gave Kami jr. a taste of his own medicine. Long story short, Kami Jr never let that happened to Naruto again.

With Kyuubi:

The Nine Tails was no fool! He knew Kami Jr was behind this! He just had to be! But to deprive Kyuubi of his sleep!?

"Maybe I should have paid him back for that poker game" Kyuubi muttered, not that Naruto could hear. His loud crying was echoing in the cage so loud that Kyuubi started to whimper. He covered his ears with his paws, but soon it seemed the crying got louder. It wasn't too soon before the Kyuubi started to cry with him.

'_I'm so sorry! I won't kill anymore! Minato! If you're watching this, Help ME!'_

With Minato:

This is the best day of his life! He, along with some other spirits who had gathered around the screen, was sitting down and eating popcorn at what was happening. On the screen, it wasn't just Naruto crying, but the Kyuubi and Kami jr, too!

Now we all now why he hates Kyuubi, but not helping Naruto or Kami? Well, is he alive? So that means he hates Kami, but Naruto…. He sometimes cursed at his father for leaving him all alone. Sure he didn't know Minato was his father, but it stilled hurt. So, pay back time!

But soon it got depressing so he tried to turn it off, but he couldn't. He saw Kami jr sit up.

"This is what you get for watching us suffer!" Kami mouthed as he flipped Minato off. Then he went back to crying at the noise of his parents. Soon all the spirits, along with Minato, were crying, too.

"Make it stop!" Minato screamed as he couldn't get any sleep.

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_**Yep, no one got any sleep that. Let me know how I did! If you have any ideas let me know! AKK, out.**_


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